Feeling Alive...

Have you ever just really felt alive?  A feeling that is hard to describe... but just from deep within you can feel your heart beating for what is right.  There is something about being here that makes me alive.  I assume it is just the ability to serve these kids and just the idea that His will is being carried out.  But, even in the littlest things I just feel like things are so right.

This past week (as with all weeks) God has revealed some things to me.  So the week started normal... and then Tuesday something bad happened to my computer.  It got a little wet... and I was just sure that EVERYTHING I had on it was gone.  So I prayed and cried and went to bed.  I got up early to call my Mom and she just reminded me that it is just property.  It can be replaced.  Life will go on.  How foolish I feel when things sink in and I realize I reacted like my world was going to crash down.  So, I prayed about it and then just realized oh well, it happens. Life went on.  And then there was a miracle.  My computer worked.  But, then it didn't work.  Then I took it to a repair shop and it worked.  Then I brought it home and it didn't work.  So currently... it is sitting beside me dead.  All of that is not the point of my story... then I read a facebook status about the well pump at our school being broken.  And I thought, oh how terrible.  And I said a prayer like 'God you know our needs.  Help us.' And I moved right along with my daily routine.  And then a few hours later God smacked me in the face with the revelation of being so incredibly selfish!  And I could just hear him be like... 'umm excuse me Amanda, but when your little computer stopped working and you prayed so earnestly about how you need it and I listened.  And that little computer well it really only affects you.  This pump... it not only affects all of the children living at Destino, but think about the 250 kids that will be at school on Monday, and Tuesday, and Wednesday with no running water... oh and on top of that the electricity needs paid.  I am needed... and all you said was a one sentence wimpy little prayer.'  This is usually how my conversations with God goes... sometimes it is a still small voice and other times it is him saying 'HELLO AMANDA.  Wake up.'

So, wow... with all of that said.  God is teaching me daily about the right way to live.  Sometimes I get overwhelmed and then I realize once again... this is not a feeling from God.  God is love.  Yes, I am challenged here.  But, it is a good challenge.

I feel like I have so much to say today.  Not so much for you or whoever reads this, but for me.  To serve as a reminder when I read back through these ramblings and think 'Oh yea, God is so good.'

Wednesday nights we go to an English Bible study and then on Sunday mornings we go to the same place for Spanish church.  So, I want to share one more cool thing that God is teaching me through the church here.

On Wednesday we talked about CRAZY things God has said.  It was fun to sit back and laugh about some of the things that can be taken out of context (hate your mother and father, if your arm causes you to sin cut it off, eat my flesh and drink my blood, sell all of your possesions and give to the poor, have a banquet and invite the poor, etc..,) and then when we talked about the actual meanings of those things.  And we discussed maybe how God and Jesus wanted us to understand those things and OBEY those things I listen and nod and think wow... that is some crazy stuff.  And then, with one simple verse I can be so challenged.  'If you love me.  Obey me.'  John 14 5.  Shew.  I'm pretty sure he meant everything too. 

So, I am learning to obey.  Everyday.  And boy do I fail. 

They teach me about God's love everyday.

El Rey Leon. Nostalgia.

Another week completed.  And another about to begin.  I am thankful that I don't have the Sunday Night Blues (yet... I know at some point they may come... but for now, Sundays are about preparing for the week, but not an overwhelming feeling of bleh like I use to have).

One day "the kids" came over (I can't remember which day... it all kind of blurrs together).  Kelly and Roleyn watched TV while Glenish, Joselyn, and I painted our nails. 

Friday the 7th graders had their "Celebration of the New Year"  at church.  It is always awesome to watch them.  My students inspire me in so many ways.  Their ability to memorize scriputre is amazing.  They challenge me to work on this skill that I have somewhat lost since the days of VBS (I was all about memorizing those verses to get stickers or whatever at the end of the week).  But, as an adult I really kind of stink at "hiding your word in my heart" at least in the idea of memorization and not just "general themes."  So, as they memorize so will I.

Besides memorization the students as sang and did an interpretive movement.  I love seeing all 30 of them!  The new students from Jardin de Gracias mesh so well with the Destino kids.  At the beginning of the year I thought they would be separated (Jardin kids with Jardin friends and Destino with Destino friends), but Monday morning as the 7th graders got off the bus and I watched them walk into their classroom, they were integrated like they had all grown-up going to school together.

Dani left on Saturday.  I am sad to see him go.  We had the same strange-sense-of-humor.

But, him leaving gave us a reason to head to San Pedro Sula!  So Saturday we got up early.  Caught a bus (where Amanda and I insisted on sitting up front with the driver... where I awkwardly slid around on my seat for the two hour bus ride).  Saw a dog get ran over.  Grew more found of our driver when he got out of the bus to move the dog so it didn't keep getting hit.  Said our goodbyes to Dani.  Hopped in a taxi for City Mall.  Shopped.  Ate Quiznos.  WATCHED EL REY LEON (The Lion King) IN THREE-D, IN SPANISH!!!  Shopped some more.  Ate Churros (my connection to the woolfest this weekend since they kind of tasted like funnel cake topped with Nutella).  And then caught another taxi.

We got back to the bus station and realized we had missed the last bus to Sigua... but luckily caught the last one towards Comayagua.  Where Bowen then sat next to a woman with a puppy (circle of life eh?) and I sat next to an interesting man named Allan.  Got to Sigua.  Caught another taxi.  And finally made it home for the evening.  

It is always amusing to me how God gives me themes or messages.  And he makes me hear it over and over again until it really sinks in!  My first year I was here my theme seemed to be "living a good story."  I heard sermons on it read books about it and it was everywhere.  Then it was the "love" them theme.  Galatians 5:6 was always on my mind.  The desire to just LOVE others like Jesus does.  And so now I'm excited about what God will place as his next theme in my life!  What will my next "life-verse" be?  I know one thing he is challenging me to is encouragement.  I feel like it isn't my love language, but it is so many people's that I really need to get better about it. 

What is God teaching you?

October, Rain, and a little bit of Insanity

Beautiful 2nd grade girls

 
The weeks are going by and God's presence is strong.  October is here and so is the rain! Here is just a quick recap of the past few weeks:

I met (err well not really met... listened to I suppose) Jim Elliot's brother-in-law at a Missionary conference this weekend.  If you don't know who Jim Elliot is-- he was the missionary who was killed in Ecuador in the 1950's by a tribe of Indians.  His wife later ministered to the same tribe.  Very inspiring story!
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose."  -- Jim Elliot

The speaker had been a missionary in Costa Rica for years and had a lot of interesting stories.  The conference was in Sigua, but for missionaries all over Honduras.  Because of school and Destino church I didn't get to attend a lot of it, but the two "talks" that I heard were quite interesting. There were about 130 people there mostly families with children (lots of children).

I've done some "nesting" I guess you could call it... like buying glasses and a salt and pepper shaker.  Making home.  Really home. 

Bowen, Jenna, and I started Insanity.  It is supposed to be 60 days... but because of our schedules it is looking like it might take us... a little bit longer.

I feel a little behind and my to do list keeps growing... but in the end I know that I am here to shower God's love and mercy on these kids.

Also::  We are looking for a PE teacher if you or anyone you know is interested!

------------------Hmm.... and a knock at the window---------

A boy and his mother just showed up at my house with a small question about English.  2 hours later and reinforcement from Bowen, Osman is now a little bit more ready for his exam tomorrow.  I guess. 

Life is so interesting here.  The unexpected because the norm.

Last Saturday (I think) Bowen and I had Malerie over for a FEAST.  We have a delicious coconut shrimp tradition.  But, it was enhanced by well:  running out of coconut so also having garlic shrimp, and the addition of coconut rice, red lobster biscuits, salad, homemade dressing and tortillas, steak, oh yea... all of it.  Oh, and of course Dani and Jenna.

"Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls."
                   -- Mother Teresa

Lord, give me an abundance of joy as I minister to these kids and these people.